Farewell

My last blog post. So I am transferring to the University of Memphis. I can't wait to go back home. At the same time, I am really going to miss all the moments I had here. I have meet some amazing people. Sometimes I wish I could have started this semester over because I know that I could have done better. I learned a lot though. I couldn't ask for more. I'm so glad I had the opportunity to go here, even if everything didn't work out the best. I'm going to take this experience and run with it. I wonder what else is in store for me......whatever it is, I'm excited.

Step off the ledge

I looked over the ledge and saw nothing. Absolutely nothing. How did this come to being? When I jumped, would there be a solution to my problems? No. Obviously running from it didn't solve anything. Why would jumping be any different? So, I took one step backwards to face the fact. I messed up and it was all my fault. Now, how do I fix the problem? Picking up the pieces and construct the best I can.

This semester does not look to good. Total fail. I missed too many classes and assignments. All I can do now is work on what I can. I have a final tomorrow and Thursday. My last week. Feels good saying that. Man, this school is challenging. I thought no problem. Just like high school, but I didn't want it to be just like high school. I wanted what all college students want- freedom (but the wrong kind). Yeah, it doesn't work like that. Responsibilities are the new parents. But before things get too out of reach, let someone know. That was my mistake. Also, don't run away. Okay that's it... took only one month for a hot mess to occur. More to come...

Just Breathe

There are only a couple weeks left of the semester. I have exams, tests, and papers all crammed next week. Fun stuff. I realized that I haven't really talked much about the Maryville lifestyle as much so this blog is dedicated to academics.

When I initially began my search for the perfect college, I though that I had myself figured out. I wanted to go to a small private school as far away from Memphis but still within Tennessee (for the Hope scholarship). I was determined to be a pharmacist. I don't know why I wanted to become one because I was never the smart one in my family nor did I enjoy science. I began to think about it and I realized that the job security was the only factor as to why I considered it. I choose Maryville because I needed to focus. Also I wanted to go to a liberal arts school. I am a fairly well-rounded person so I knew that I needed a education that would allow me to express my different talents. Well, I definitely reached for the stars. I wanted to major in biochemistry. It's not that I can't do it because I know that I have the ability to do it; it's the lack of motivation that I realized why I have been slacking in attendance and grades. Maryville college is challenging. No matter what the major is. I hear my roommate typing away at 2 in the morning for her Bible studies class. But if there is not desire in the classes then the chances of passing is slim. I noticed a change in myself. I have always been the student that sat in the front, knew all the answers, and turned in every assignment on time. My grades ranged from average to above average. Not to mention that I went to a prestigious private school with strict policies, meaning I never missed school. However, I have slacked off the grid. I don't put as much hours in studying as I used to or prepare myself for class. I knew something was wrong.

The classes I am taking now do not meet my needs. I am an artsy person. I need to be creative. The problem with art are the lack of fields associated with art. I needed security. Architecture has always been an interest of mine. Although pharmacy seems more promising, I need to choose a pathway that I will enjoy. Parents and teachers say it all the time- do what you love. Sometimes money can get in the way of what we love. I just want to be successful. I just going about it the wrong way. Okay, so basically what I am saying is that it is better to be undecided than to major in a subject because of societal success. Anyways, enough with that.

Let me talk about the residence buildings at Maryville. So, I live in Davis, which is the all girl freshman dorm. People call it the "virgin vault". I find that pretty funny. Davis is a great residence building. It's clean and organized. The RAs are always on top of things. They are open and friendly. A lot of the girls seem pleased with the atmosphere because its a "girly" place. I'll be honest, I hate it. It just doesn't appeal to me. I love my roommate to death and I don't have problems with any of the girls, but I feel like it is just not the place for me. Being a freshman has its disadvantages because we really don't get the choice to live in any other buildings. I understand since we are fresh out of home and we need a leash on us to get us a taste of the real world. But it's okay. It doesn't appeal to everyone.

So today my freshman class and other freshman classes had to do a fitness test today. The challenge was to be completed in teams. I was in a group of three. We had to run 2 miles, do 65 sit ups, 70 push-ups, and climb the tower. It was pure torture, especially since it was on a Wednesday. Wednesdays are my worst days. I have four classes on that day and I only get a 45 minute break to eat lunch. Since the fitness challenge ran over on time, I was stressed because I still had to eat, change, and get my stuff ready for chemistry and chemistry lab. I was miserable. I was sweaty and gross for my classes. For me that is the worst feeling because I like to be presentable. Well, that was about it for today. Now I have to finish my research paper that is due tomorrow. GREAT.

Kidnap the Sandy Claws

HALLOWEEN! AH, my favorite. Okay so I don't know exactly what went on the past week academically. I was so excited for the weekend. I might have missed more classes than I should have. EH. The weather has been so beautiful with the leaves changing and everything. When I went to Memphis that last time, I grabbed my dad's camera. His camera is an old-school photography camera. I love it. I took advantage of the weather and camera. So, on Friday I was supposed to go to a party near campus but I started to get "krunk" to early. I felt to sick to go and socialize. Yeah- total bummer. Saturday was when most of the activities occurred. On Saturday I went with Matt (senior), Jessica (senior), and Mathieu (junior) trick or treating. In order to prepare for our adventure we listened to The Nightmare Before Christmas soundtrack. I came into conclusion that "Kidnap Sandy Claws" is my favorite song. It is so catchy. Anyways, so I was a kitty cat for trick or treating. It was funny because we went to a street next to campus, and we felt a need to explain to every house why college students were trick or treating. It is actually quite sad how you can't enjoy those little things anymore. It never occurred to me that there was a age limit to having fun. Makes me miss being a kid again. Well, I could probably still pass off as a little girl but the point is that it sucks growing up. Mathieu is from France and they don't really celebrate Halloween the same way we do here. He was fascinated by the spirit involved. The first house really got into the decorations. They tried so hard to scare us. We kept talking with all the candy-givers. Usually as a kid it takes seconds to get through a street of houses but it took us 30 min to hit 4 houses. Anyways, so then later that night I changed outfits to go to a cabin party in the smokies. I became Little Red Riding Hood. There were a lot of soccer players and random people there. Costumes consisted of Bruno, Mario and Luigi, Police officer, Vampire, Spice Girls, and etc. Mathieu said that in France the people there try to look as scary as possible. He found it bizarre that people choose whatever they want here especially the girls take that opportunity to dress in a provocative manner without any judgements. Well, that party turned out to be a lot of fun. The next day was sad because that means Sunday- business time. Gotta get prepared for the week. Esh. Not fun.

Impulsive

Wow, time flies by. I did not realize how long it has been since I have blogged. Unfortunately, I do not have any pictures to post up. Last week definitely flew by since I had a Chemistry exam and papers to turn in. By the way, Chemistry is kicking my butt. I must admit that I haven't put as much studying time as I should. Anyways, once again my boyfriend came to visit me for the week. His school closed down for a week randomly, which is probably why my week flew by. Also, I have been a little sick with possibly a cold. The weather has been so crazy. One day it was freezing and the next it is warm like spring. The one day it was cold, the school decided to change its conditioner system to all heat. So now we have no air conditioning. I need to buy a fan because I hate sleeping when it's warm. Now that it is warm outside, I am miserable because I feel like everywhere I go is hot. But hey I should be grateful to even have heat. So, Andrew stayed all week to distract me (basically). I loved it and everything but that made it more difficult to do my work. Since Halloween is this weekend, I received a Halloween care package from my family. I recommend parents to sign up for the care packages. I love receiving snacks and candy. My favorite part is the letter my family fills out with the packages. They just say goofy things that makes me miss them. I have been craving candy so bad, making it a great surprise. Oh and random splurge on college food: the quality is not the best and the fact that every college basically has buffet as the main dining service makes it worse. I have the worst acne and immune system right now. I may be from the poor quality of food and the amount I am eating. I should exercise but my time is crunched. I remember the first week of college, I exercised everyday. HAHA. How unrealistic I was to think that I could keep that up....yeah. But I should. Anyways, back to my week. So, on Friday Mary, my roommate, received a stuffed kitten from an admirer. My boyfriend thought she got a real kitten and was asking to pet it, which was funny. Then, Andrew and I both wanted to pet a kitten so bad. It has been so long since we have seen our pets. We decided to drive to his college because there are so many cats/kittens around his campus. The drive was about 4 hours. We were just being impulsive. Since Memphis is only an hour from his college, we decided to visit our homes on Saturday. I slept for hours in my bed on Saturday. On Sunday we left to come back to Maryville. He left that night for his college. Andrew drives a lot. Since I'm still a little sick and the drive did not help, I was so exhausted the next day......I might have overslept. At least I made it to my Chemistry class. Now, I need to catch up again. GEEEEZZ.

Happy Birthday...?

Something interesting happened at dinner today-

So I was eating lunch with my roommate and a friend. It was around 7:20, and Pearsons, the main dining cafeteria, was crowded with athletes, since most of them just finished practice. I had just finished eating when I heard people, mostly guys, singing "Happy Birthday." From the corner of my eye I saw fairly stalky guys, probably football players, walking around the back of the room. Once of the guys had a plate filled with ice cream and cookies. I noticed they were getting closer to my table. I was curious to see whose birthday it was at this point. Right when I turned my head, the Birthday plate made its way in front of me. They crowded around my table singing "Happy Birthday" and clapping. I knew it wasn't my birthday so I was puzzled. After they were done, they were laughing and went back to their table. A girl in the table in front of mine asked if it was my birthday and I replied that it wasn't. So she insisted that they thought I was cute so they picked me as the victim. Whether or not that's true, I was still flattered and enjoyed the fun from the game. I returned their present and explained that it wasn't my birthday, which they knew. But it was all fun and games. I found it adorable that the students are comfortable enough to do little things like that.

HOEDOWN

I have been slammed this weekend with craziness. It was homecoming weekend so that should explain how busy I was this past weekend. Last Friday there was a party at a house out in the boondocks of Maryville. It was really nice though because it was out in the countryside. A band played at the bottom of a hill. They were soooooooo good. They played the best music such as Radiohead and Sublime. The band members go to Maryville College which is nice because I see them around now. I really like that about the small campus. I think Maryville is growing on me. Just about half the campus were at the party. So I met a good variety of people. It got super cold this weekend. Having a campfire at the party made it somewhat more bearable. Since it is homecoming weekend, a lot of alumni were there. Oh and I lost my favorite blue raincoat there. I set it down with a group of people's stuff (bad idea), and it just disappeared. I was really sad about that. Anyways, it was a great reunion for a many and a fun way to get to know people. There were a bit of freshman which is great because that means that the upperclassman don't completely exclude freshmen (YAY).

On saturday was the biggest day for homecoming. I woke up late so I missed the parade. Since I had a big load of school work, I also had to miss the football game. I had been looking forward to the dance all day. The theme was Hoedown, which is like a southern theme. Not that many people seemed pumped about the theme. A lot of girls wore jeans, cowboy boots, plaid shirt, with pigtails. I ended up wearing high heel boots with a dress that had a southern print to it. I'll have to find a picture that someone took. So I may not download it on here for a little while. Well, there didn't seem to be a big turnout at the dance but there was a lot of freshman support and a bit of upperclassman. The music was mainly rap and 80s music haha. The majority of people dressed up for the theme of the dance. The food was good and once again I had fun seeing familiar faces. I left fairly early since I was just really tired from the whole weekend. Before I went back to my room I stopped by to see a friend in Beeson, which is the upperclassman suite building. The suites are really nice. They get their own kitchen, which makes me jealous! Anyways, she had people over- mainly alumni. They were hanging out, playing games and such. Then, I hit the hay.

Sunday mainly consisted of getting ready for the week. I have an exam tomorrow in Chemistry and a couple papers due. The highlight was the fact that my sister came into town for a little bit. She and two friends go to school in Memphis. They are all juniors. They were making their way up to Asheville, NC to visit my brother. We all ate at a restaurant in downtown Maryville called the Tomato Head. The best pizza place ever. My boyfriend and I ate there first, and I feel in love. They use all organic products and their main speciality is pizza- sooooo good. My sister brought me a bag filled with things I need that my mom packed, which will save my life. In the bag were snacks, medicine, winter boots, and candy! All the necessities of life...okay not really. Alright back to studying a writing papers. Eww. I'm looking forward to this coming up week after my exams and such. My boyfriend is coming to visit me, which is exciting. Always nice to look forward to seeing him, especially since he reminds me of home. Okay, till next time.